Ponderings (November 2009) - “GRIEF”

According to Merriam-Webster's Dictionary …

Grief is “deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement; a cause of such suffering; an unfortunate outcome”

Sharing my thoughts …

This month, one of our cats, Gaia, died unexpectedly.  She was an important part of our family.  Her death hit us hard and we have grieved.  According to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, M.D., there are 5 key stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.  Even though my husband, son, and I expressed our grief differently, we all went through the 5 stages. 

Anytime you have a major loss or receive unexpected bad news you can experience grief.  Grief is painful and it hits you in waves.  You may end up cycling through the grief stages a number of times and even get stuck on one stage.  The key is to realize that grief is normal when you’ve experienced loss and to listen to your grief and give it healthy expression. 

Questions to ponder …

1. How has grief changed you?
2. How do you experience and express grief?
3. How do you respond to others who are grieving?
4. What helps you deal with grief and heal the hurt you feel after a loss?
5. Think of a major loss you’ve experienced.  How did you express your grief?
6. What can you do to help and honor others going through the grief process?
7. How do you feel when you repress your grief?  When you express your grief?
8. Have you ever gotten stuck in one phase of the grief cycle?  How did you get unstuck?

Related quotes …

Give sorrow words.  The grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart, and bids it break.  [William Shakespeare]

Grief drives men into habits of serious reflection, sharpens the understanding, and softens the heart.  [John Adams]

To spare oneself from grief at all cost can be achieved only at the price of total detachment, which excludes the ability to experience happiness.  [Erich Fromm]

When grief is fresh, every attempt to divert only irritates.  You must wait till it be digested, and then amusement will dissipate the remains of it.  [Samuel Johnson]